a prank for people who don't want to be too mean

As stated on this page, I love to make a ruckus with my keyboard. I take piano lessons now, but one of my only regrets is quitting piano in the second grade. I don’t remember why I started playing piano originally. It wasn’t because my parents told me to, or because my friends thought it was fun, or even because I genuinely thought it would be a good skill to have. I have no idea. Well, I actually do vaguely remember thinking that it would be cool to play songs by Taylor Swift.

Regardless, I began taking piano lessons at my house from the music teacher at one of the public elementary schools. I also wanted to learn how to play the flute. Although now this has almost no appeal to me, it was something that I really thought was important that I do. My teacher suggested that I learn to play the recorder first, as sort of a “gateway instrument” to the flute. Thus, I started taking lessons, dedicating half the allotted time piano, half to recorder. Slowly, my interest in piano ebbed away as I realized that I was playing Mary Had a Little Lamb, not You Belong With Me. Recorder edged piano out of my lessons, and I finally stopped playing piano altogether. Recently-ish, around the beginning of this school year, I started playing piano again. My friend is hardcore amazing at piano, and I kind of couldn’t live with the fact that I didn’t know how to play.

Mini life lesson: If you can’t live without doing something, do it.

I started taking voice lessons at the same time as piano, so I now do half-piano, half-voice lessons. This time, though, I really enjoy both piano and voice, so I don’t think I’ll end up quitting either one.

I love being able to play piano. Even though I’m not Beethoven quite yet, it’s still one of my favorite things to do. There are pianos in the band room in my school, as well as the drama room, so sometimes I’ll just randomly play the piano between classes and at lunch. It’s good to have a few actual songs memorized, because Heart and Soul can only be a masterpiece so many times. Speaking of which, Heart and Soul:

Heart and Soul in and of itself is one of my favorite pastimes. (If you are unfamiliar, skip to the video at the bottom.) More specifically, translating Heart and Soul into every key possible is one of my favorite pastimes. Let me preface this with the fact that I am not a person who loves pranks. Despite this, I love to play Heart and Soul in the key of A major. You may be very confused, and this is completely rational. How is that a prank, double question mark, you may ask.

Allow me to explain. Most people don’t automatically know what key a song is being played in upon hearing it. I’m sure there are some people who can, but the majority of the people I know don’t have that ability. Anyway, for those who don’t know, Heart and Soul is usually played in the key of C major. Therefore, if the bottom chords are being played in A major, pianist number two is expecting to join in with the melody in the key of C. When they do so, however, it sounds horrible and screwed up when the background is being played in A, and the melody chimes in, plunked out in C. It’s a really fun thing to do, and I highly suggest playing Heart and Soul in the key of A major. 

In order, the fingering for the chords for Heart and Soul in A major go as follows (keys to play with pink lines):

Original image from here.

You can play it any way you like, but here’s an example video:

Have fun screwing people up! I know I do, and remember: you’re doing no harm, so this prank is okay.

Cheers, and I hope this post made some sort of sense so that you can revel in your own piano playing glory.

xx Names are a box

discussing why teaching yourself is a fine idea, the universal language, and words that don't exist

I taught myself to play “I Am Not a Robot” by Marina and the Diamonds on the piano a few days ago. Now, this could be a post about how sad my life is, how tragic that I spend my days teaching myself to play powerfully empathetic tunes on what looks like a large xylophone as shown in movies before colour television.

(See what I mean? I'll settle for "not really.")

Or.

Or, it could be a post about how teaching yourself is a fantastic way to “waste time” by doing something actually productive. It is immensely satisfying to be able to play a song that you know, and even more so if no one else showed you how to do it. I cannot describe to you the enjoyment of having the chords sound dare-I-say correct. When you start the song on a D and it comes out exactly as it does when you listen to the version Ms. Diamandis herself released in 2010 as her third track of her first album “The Family Jewels," it's just gratifying if I do say so.

The satisfaction that notes are universal. A C chord played at Carnegie Hall is the same one a lowly thirty-one-year-old plunks out as he tries to find the meaning of life, or at least a way to get out of his mom’s basement. The excitement that comes from the fact that there is the slightest possibility that I could harmonize with someone on the other side of the world, if the accident will. That a note in “See I’m Smiling” could be the same as one in “Seven Nation Army” as one in “Für Elise.” Now, who knows if any of those have the same notes at all, but just the possibility and the probability. What I’m saying is that it would hardly be unlikely.

Music notes are among the few things that are truly universal. Music breaks language barriers, economic barriers, political barriers, physical barriers. Caen las murallas, amiright? Music notes convey emotion because of where a dot was printed on a page and what sign comes before a measure. And that's insane.

Some disagree, arguing that lyrics convey the meaning of a song. I ask them, then, why do we have notes? For fun? Does so-and-so from that one opera sing in a minor key just because they’re picking and choosing? No. S/He/Xi does not. It’s done that way to convey certain emotions. The fact that the human ear, and maybe other ears, for that matter, can hear emotion without the language that we created is only fitting. It’s also somewhat of a miracle.

So that was a fun stream of consciousness.

As a spacer, let's add in this picture from the floor of the Marina and the Diamonds concert, because relevance etc.

In other news, on the yesterday-of-yesterday I had a “what-the-heck-even-is-irregardless” moment. Which, in fact, what is irregardless?

For those of you confused, I’m referring to the literal word “irregardless,” which makes absolutely no sense whatsoever. Let me break it down for you. Regardless means “without regard” which means “without paying attention to the present situation” or “despite the prevailing circumstances.” "Regardless" is already a negative word. The prefix “ir-“ is also negative, as in irregular, irreplaceable, irrefutable, etc., making “irregardless” a double negative word (or shall we say “word”).

People apparently got confused, probably because of the “irre-“ trend going on, and started saying “irregardless” where they should have been saying “regardless.” Now “irregardless" and “regardless" are used interchangeably by people who aren’t peevish about those sorts of things, and also probably never had a grammar geek for a mother. It's probably hereditary. Anyway, "irregardless" is apparently now in the dictionary, but at least it’s categorized as “informal” or “non-standard,” which is the least they could do.

Then again, so is “ain’t" as it turns out, so being in the dictionary barely means anything at all.

If you’d like to read the article that I turned to for answers during this time of crisis, click here. If not, that makes sense, as many people most likely don’t really care about that sort of thing. I say it's all in heredity. Cheers.